As I got a new parcel of review items delivered today there was one in particularlly that I was surprisingly excited about and another I was curious for one particular reason.
First Item The first item/product in question was a collar and cuff set, and while it was very pretty looking, the reason I was excited about it was more to do with the fact I wanted to explore some new kinks and see how it went.
Although a collar and cuffs might seem rather basic to some, for me it definitely seemed like a good place to start especially as I’m going solo. In the past I’ve looked in on fetish wear and kink toys from the far away sidelines, and always wondered if it was for me or not but never known where to start nor been comortable in buying anything to try out.
Having something basic like a collar and cuffs that I can wear solo, take pictures of me wearing and go at my own pace gives me a certainly level of confidence knowing I can do my own thing on my own terms and be as comfortable as I can. As I get more comfortable I can then decided to maybe expand what I have and play around with new stuff seeing how much I like it, if at all.
Not only will I then have an idea of what I like and dislike for myself and thje pleasure I have on my own, but it may help for future relationships in knowing what I like and dislike should anything relating to kink and fetishes come up.
Second Item The second item I’m curious about is a rabbit vibe with squirting feature which was a replacement item I accepted for a different squirting toy I wanted that I think was either low on stock or out of stock. As a penis owner I’ve always seen rabbit vibes used by those with a vulva, but in 2021 I’m well aware that most toys can be used by anyone so even if I have a penis and no vulva that doesn’t mean I can’t make use out of it.
Of course I will likely end up using it anally and seeing how well it works for me, and enjoying the fact I’m using a toy not really marketed towards myself.
“It will always be a mystery to me how we can’t forget the love that forgot us.”
The quote for this weeks Quote Quest really struck a chord with me as it’s something I think about several times a year, and I knew I could easily write this post.
I’ve fallen in love twice in my life, the first time being out of the blue and sudden with no real indication it was going to happen. This first love came with a a trillion butterflies in my stomach, someone on my mind constantly and and overall wonderful feeling I had never felt before till that point. Nothing ever came of it although the person in question I’m sure knew I liked them but I don’t know if they knew it was more than me liking them?
The 2nd love was a new freindship were I got close to someone initially as a friend, then everyone and their dog felt we should be together which eventually happned and I fell in love with them. Again I had some of the same feelings as my first love but this time they became even more intense and I could help thinking of the person in question. We last 7 months before splitting up the week before Valentines and I never saw them again.
I’m sure the girl in question I fell for doesn’t remember me, I know she now has a kid, an other half and her own life to think about more than some old high-school class-mate that liked her 20 years ago (As of 2021). She probably doesn’t realise/know that she was my first love and all the feelings I felt for the first time ever
Just like major life ahcievements I can’t help but remember my first love. My memory of how I fell for someone, the day it happened and what I was doing when it hit is super vivid in my mind knowing all the details. Those intense feelings that overcame me had never been there before, I hadn’t felt such happiness about someone and I wanted to have them for a long as I could.
My 2nd love although a relationship of 7 months plus a period of friendship before that doesn’t mean the girl in question will remember me or anything that happened. She may have known I loved her but I don’t know if she knew just how much I did at the time and these days she has her own life to think about rather than an EX or even someone she loved if she even loved me like I did her?.
Having even more intesne feelings the 2nd time around again is something I can’t forget, and to this day 16/17 years later I will always remember the dream were the I had the most intense feelings come over me and how I never wanted them to go but while they did go in someways they also stayed with me as a reminder of how good things can be in life.
I may not think about the 2 people I fell for much if at all, but I will always remember the love I had for them and how magical it was to feel something so good.
“I feel the need to endanger myself every so often.”
In my life there is a few things I really don’t like one of them being heights. I don’t use the words fear or phobia with heights simply because I will voluntarily go places high up or do adventurous things at height no matter how scary it may be when I’m doing it.
My first adventurous thing I did with heights was a bungee jump from a bridge back in 2015 alongside my brother-in-law. While the thought of it was scary I knew that I wanted to show myself that I could go out of my comfort zone and do something like this, while at the same time I wanted to show others I was capable of doing something adventurous, even if I knew it didn’t matter what others thought of me.
Come the day of my jump and as we climbed to the underside of a bidge I could help but be nervous. Once I was ready to go, all pre-checks done I stood there right on the edge of the underside of a bridge looking down at a river, my arms were stretch out and I could feel my heart beating fast.
I knew this was safe, lots of others have jumped from here but the element of danger was appartent. My heart continued to beat fast and then I heard it, 3-2-1 GO….. and which point and without pause, I leapt off and suddenly I could feel the air as I quickly plumpted towards the river below before the bungee cord reached it max length caught me. I was hanging there upside down catching my breath and taking it all in what I just done.
The saying “If everyone else jumped off a bridge, would you?” came into my mind, I had done just that jumped of a bridge albeit not with friends. As I was winched back up to safety I vowed “Never again”.
Several years later and despite saying “Never again” I ended up at thje same brige across the same river but this time to do what is called a bridge swing. Not only was I with my brother-in-law but he also brought a friend he met in hosptial when my sister had premature twins. This time was just as nerve-wracking as the last even though I had experience from the previous time.
The burdge swing was completely different, I was told to go into a seating stance whereby the platform I was on slowly moved back from under my feet as I hung above the river before I was released into a drop then swing.
As I initially swung quite fast from my drop again I could feel the air rush past me and for a breif second the element of danger filled my mind. “Humans weren’t meant to fall in the manner I had” was my first thought but as my inital scare wore off I began to enjoy myself, and was able to let go of the rope then extend the GoPro camera I had strapped to my right wrist so that it could take in the views of the river and capture my face as I swung.
Not only did I enjoy the bridger swing more than the bungee, but there was also a sense that I had just done something I swore I wouldn’t do after my first experience and that I could go out of my comfort zone to do things that might invlove danger but aren’t exactly dangerous.
Lingerie is For Everyone and Love Yourself are two memes i’m participating in with this post and they very much fit the theme of it and can be related to the post.
I may be a bi/pan-sexual male but Lingerie is For Everyone. No matter who you are wearing lingerie is totally fine, and an awesome thing to do that can also happen to look good too. Male, female, trans…..etc it doesn’t matter. Loving yourself can mean being comfortable in lingerie if it’s something that brings you joy. If you enjoy the feel of wearing it, how it looks on you or anything else about lingerie then even if you’re not who lingerie is targeted at, that’s something you can overlook and say hey “I’m doing what I want and what feels good”
This months theme of Love Yourself (in April) is all about the body and one aspect of that is with what I wear beyond the everyday attaire.
Things started many years ago with lingerie where I started to realise that I enjoyed a lot of it for how it looked and how it would be to wear on myself even though I was male and the idea of buying or wearing lingerie wasn’t something I was comfortable or comfident in doing so. I didn’t want to be someone who just bought stuff to get off on for sexual gratification but genuinely wanted to wear items that looked good and was comfortable especially with my penis, while at the same time feeling sexy in wearing it.
Many years past but eventually I began to be a bit more comfortable and got a few items of lingerie. Some pieces where my size, some a bit too big and small for me although all items I liked the look of so for me it was more about getting them first, and then any future items I could work on getting an idea of what would be a good size and a good fit.
Having got said lingerie I have enjoy wearing it when in the house, ocasionally taking some pics for posts on my blog and once or twice going out in the more comfy pairs of lingerie. Being out in lingerie I wore them firstly like I would my own undies with the added benefit being I knew what they looked like so could get a secret pleasure from that, and knowing that random people I passed in the street would have no idea what I had on.
I’m now not only able to view lingerie in a sexy way but also appreciate how items look and feel particularly the items I have, but at the same time I can appreciate others in lingerie. I see lots of nice stuff through twitter and sinful sunday which I love and sometimes wish I could wear, not because I can’t wear but because I now know that there are some items that wouldn’t fit me and items that look good on others but not on me.
Back in 2013 I started exploring toys and one area I noticed was kink items. From collars, handcuffs, rope…etc there was a wide variety of items out there. Having just mustered up the confidence to buy my first few basic sex toys, being a generally unconfident person and at the time having a vanilla personality I never looked into these more kink stuff, plus being single I always thought most would be good for couples.
For several years after that I always saw kink stuff, whether it was items from toy shops, images on twitter or just others who had an interest in kink and at first I was always of the opinion that most/all kink wasn’t for me. Fast foward to 2021 though and I have become more open to the idea of testing the waters with kink stuff, so much so that I have a collar and handcuffs item coming for review at somepoint which I super excited for, more excited than I would have ever thought.
I’m even hoping to try and get other kink stuff in the future for review but that depends on whether I like the first item I get, and also most of it will likely be basic so I can see what I like and or dislike, and then work my way up to other more advanced things if I want to.
Wearing what you want no matter who you are. It can be fun and refreshing
If I found out anything over the years it’s that you can wear what you want no matter who you are and whether or not things are marketed toweards you. Even though I consider myself male that shouldn’t stop me from wearing lingerie or any clothing for that matter whether it’s meant for male or female. In my case currently it’s restricted to lingerie but that still rings trues, I can wear lingerie if I want and at least in myself I know I’m doing it no different that if I was wearing everyday boxers albeit I can get more pleasure from the look of lingerie than I can boxers.
The kink items for me are different than what I said above in regards to lingerie and clothing. It’s more about exploring a different side to me that I may not have known was there, and possibly finding that I love it or not, there’s no harm in finding out it’s not for me. It also may give me more body confidence if I do like kink stuff through what potential items may look like on me.
As I’m participating in Love Yourself (in April) I decided to link it up with other memes like Sinful Sunday. This post will not only be an image but also a short topic both of which I hope will compliment each other for the respective memes.
Since taking part in Sinful Sunday and other memes where I take pictures of myself and can view others bloggers pictures I’ve begun to realise something that I like from both.
When taking closer up images of myself or even with farther away images I’ve found the little details to be so enjoyable. One image I took back in January had a comment about my back/bum dimples being cute and this was the first time I really took notice of them and how others enjoyed them. Then in Feb I posted an image of my butt, very close up with droplets of water showing and a texture on my skin I assume from a little chill. It was an image I immediately loved because of the fin details like the water droplets close up, the details of my skin and how these would likely be missed if I had taken an image further away, or at least not be focused on so much.
These details are there but you don’t see them in every image and even on myself I don’t always notice them everyday, but when I take the right picture I can notice my back/bum dimples, the way my skin in my butt or thights and I find enjoyment from it.
Lastly is also the fact that since I don’t always like my full body in images these close ups can be enjoyable because I’m focusing on a particular part of me which means you don’t see all the bits I dislike.
Parts of the above can extend to other peoples images too. I love seeing all aspects of someone, but their little details are enjoyable to look at. Whether they too have dimples, their skin texture and things unique to them that you notice more when close up. It may be that someone dislikes their skin or parts of themseleves but when they do post and I can see details in their image I will always appreciate that.
I know there’s no such things as a “Perfect body” as we all have different preferences as to what we like with other people we’re attracted to in a physical way even if that attraction is not the most important for you (It isn’t for me)
While I can’t ever say I’ve had body dysmorphia about myself, I do know that there have been times where I disliked the way I looked or disliked certain aspects of myself. The dislike was never in comparison to anyone, it was more a case of seing X,Y or Z part of me and thinking it wasn’t very appealing.
Now a few years back I had a slight change in the way I thought about myself. I took a few images after winning a tailed butt plug from a comp run on Twitter whereby rather than just showing some product photos I thought it would be good to actually get some shots wearing said plug.
So off I went with a smartphone in hand and took several random images with me wearing this frankly awesome tailed plug. When going through several images I deleted most but there was one that I felt good enough to post. Said image was not planned, just one of the random shots I took but it seemed to work out really well. The tail combined with my butt turned into the shape of a heart which could’ve been a sign (I didn’t think of that till now).
Having posted said image (Also shared below) and having recieved some positive feedback on it, I realised that maybe I do have parts of me that are good, particularly my butt and maybe I can post images of myself more often.
Since then I have found that yes I actually like my butt and I’m more comfortable in taking pics, although when I do take said pics, I have found that while I may like the overall images I take I am not always 100% happy with my body in it.
So no, I don’t have body dysmorphia where I will actively hate my body but at the same time I won’t be umcomfortable with taking pics. Yes I may dislike my body but the fun in taking pics is just, that the taking of said pics whether it’s getting the right angle, using locations to my advantage i.e. water from the shower or just shooting the one thing I’m ok with on my body (My butt).
And just because I always have to show this image whever possible, here the butt pic that made me realise I have a nice butt.